Tuesday, December 13, 2005

"Dear Family and Friends . . . "

Without blushing at all, I will be the first to admit that I write a pretty great Christmas newsletter. Only at this moment in time, poised to write said newsletter, I doubt my ability to write anything but drivel. And time's a'wasting. Only eleven days until Christmas. Ack!

I have a folder with a copy of each letter dating back to 1991 and if you add that to my stack of old identification cards from high school and college and summer jobs and my pale younger faces on expired driver's licenses, you get a fairly accurate and somewhat sobering picture of my life in incremental snapshots.

So tonight, I read through the newsletters. I am reassured. I can do this. I've done it before.

All I need is one brilliant shining hook, a place to hang the summary of the whole year.

I'm scared.


Blogger The Daring One said...

Why am I still awake? I don't know. I will go to bed now. Your post came up as I was headed that way and I have to say - I had the hardest time writing my letter this year too. It's like I've said everything funny and interesting on the blog and I ain't got nuthin' left to write. Good luck.

I ended up doing a weather report: The storm surge brewing in central Kathryn-Ville, accompanied by months of heat waves and emotion-bursts, resulted in the birth of hurricane "Magoo" on May --, 2005. He was definitely a level-5 event, weighing in at 10lbs 8oz. The town of Kathryn-Ville took a few months to recover from the damage and then returned to relative calm......

Cheesy, ah yes, but at least it's done.

12:42 AM  
Blogger methatiam said...

Use the ?Ho-Ho-Bah-Humbug-Ho!? picture! That is the greatest opening 1,000 words you?ll ever find.

5:58 AM  
Blogger Gina said...

No Christmas letters for me!

What am I going to say? That Mr. Personality will only poop in the potty but not pee? That I am still living in the same house with the same cars, the same clothes, the same everything?

Oh, I didn't know I was going to start the morning being such a pessimist!

But, I mailed my cards out yesterday....

8:33 AM  
Blogger Derek & Marykay said...

I'm in the same boat, sista!

9:16 AM  
Blogger Julana said...

I'm thinking of no-letter this year.

10:52 AM  
Blogger Elizabeth said...

(If your holiday letter is truly entertaining, you can disregard this comment)

Gawd...please don't tell me you're a holiday letter person. I just got one from my sister in-law. Month by month. The blow by blow. J did this in May. B did this is June. Two mustarding pages of every... little... nuance... of.... their.... lives....please.... make...it...stop. (If I believe in God will it stop? Please let me know and I will consider the conversion this very minute.)

Just my humble opinion but I don't give a poo poo ca ca about any of it. I love my brother. I love his family. I want them to be happy and healthy. Other than that, if you can't entertain me with your goofy yearly holiday letter, please don't kill a tree on my behalf.

I understand the whole idea behind it, all you holiday letter writers. You want to let people know how everyone in your family is doing. How nice. Isn't that precious? But really, who besides maybe Grandma wants to read about your family noodlings. Oh, I know, Aunti Greta and Uncle Foob. I totally forgot about them.


3:26 PM  
Blogger Yvonne said...

If I can do it you can do it! I got a brag letter from the cousin again this year - the over achieving children each wrote their own paragraph - and it was "just so chipper and great and everything is awesome and they are just the greatest, happiest most successful kids..blah blah blah...PLEASE! I'm sure you'll write a great one! One year I did a "multiple choice" letter, where I wrote a sentence and their were 4 choices for the answers - callit an interactive Christmas letter, but everyone liked it - (I gave the answers at the end of the letter) Just an idea!

3:59 PM  
Blogger Lisa said...

I guess I contradict myself because I HATE holiday newsletters, but for the past 5 years, I've done one of my own that I've inflicted on my poor family and friends.

I think it comes down to laziness. I don't want to be one of those people that just sign their name and write nothing.... But I'm too lazy to write out all my news by hand.

So... the letter. I usually write a pretty good one, but this year I didn't even try. It was a crappy year, and I think it showed in my letter... lol...

6:41 PM  
Blogger ellipsis... said...


Love ya, but the whole holiday newsletter thing just totally blows. There is just no way to be truly honest (I mean, really, who is?)without sounding like a mental case or a self-absorbed navel-gazer. Resist temptation. Be cool. Don't do it. But I know you will. Oy. I need to send you some latkes.

10:32 PM  
Blogger Judy said...

I started writing one as a sort of mockery to the Christmas letter my mother got every year from a cousin of hers. Oh, I could mock her wonderfully!

But then, her husband developed Parkinson's disease, and her letters are now so heartbreakingly painful that I feel so guilty.

11:12 PM  
Blogger Wash Lady said...

your letter is one of my holiday highlights and I'm looking forward to receiving it :)

I hope I'm still on your list.

5:39 AM  
Anonymous Amy said...

I can write the letter. It's getting them addressed and mailing them.

No letter this year....

Sigh. What do people think I run a blog for? My health?!?!@?!

12:24 PM  

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