Avoidance Tactics

I know. I wasn't even gone long enough for you to miss me. I have apparently cured my computer woes. Next up? A cure for cancer.

Actually, I'm going to watch television in a minute or two. Surely I'll be able to find a reality show somewhere. I am at the mercy of the television programmers since I don't have TiVo yet, like the cool kids do.

Tonight, I caught a glimpse of someone I wished to avoid in the grocery store. Someone I know, but not well. So, I traveled a tangled path through the store, swerving this way and that, peeking around corners before committing my cart to an aisle. I strolled ever so slowly to the checkstand, noting that the woman I wanted to avoid was already in the next line, about to pay.

I tilted away from the woman as I unloaded my cart and pretended to study the tabloids. I would have whistled an aimless tune, if only I knew how. I practiced the "If I don't look at you, I am invisible," method.

Then, she spotted me as she walked past the checkstands. "MEL!" She yelled my name and so I feigned great joy at seeing her. She gave me a message for my mother, asked me how I am ("busy," I said, my standard answer which tells everything, and yet nothing at all).

That's why it took me so long to get home from the store tonight.

Oh, and to answer a question or two. Ellipsis asked if the coffee really is better here in the Pacific Northwest, home to Starbucks. To my chagrin, I hate coffee. I thought I would drink it when I grew up, but alas, no. I adore the smell of coffee and despise the taste. I avoid steaming drinks entirely, anyway, as they make my nose run.

But I do like my chocolate with nuts. Unfortunately, I was so busy avoiding that woman at the store that I forgot to buy any.

Also, if I could choose a Superpower, I think I'd have to go with the Power of Invisibility. Wouldn't that be handy?