Thursday, September 22, 2005

"You Just Don't Fit In"

Almost all my husband's family lives in the path of Hurricane Rita. Most of them are staying put, which my husband (aka Mr. Safety) finds incredulous. If he were in the path of a hurricane, he would leave a good week prior to landfall. Mr. Safety prefers to opt on the side of caution, always. Mr. Safety would always rather be safe than sorry. Always.

Rather than worry, we are distracting ourselves with reality television. Last night, we watched the Martha Stewart version of "The Apprentice." I have always liked Martha Stewart and what she stands for: Absolute Perfection. Perfect paint colors, perfect lilac bushes, perfect creme brulee'. And now that she has this little blemish--being a convicted felon and all--I like her even more. And I like to watch people fray at the edges and sometimes implode or explode, so I like "The Apprentice," too. The melding of Martha and "The Apprentice" is a dream come true for me.

And when the scene came where she had to release one apprentice and she said, "You just don't fit in. Good-bye," my husband and I repeated the phrase over and over with glee. I would rather be fired than be told I just don't fit in, but then again, perhaps I'm still a junior-high student at heart, desperate for the cool girls to take notice of me.

Naptime's over. Time to get back to work.

14 Comments:

Blogger Feeble Knees said...

Yikes, I'll be thinking of your husband's family and praying for their safety - and his nerves. I'd be a madwoman.

If you like to watch people fray at the edges, you'd have had hours of endless entertainment around here lately. I'm not sure anymore where the edges begin and the fray ends!

Martha makes me nuts. But I still love her cookbooks. It's my dirty little secret...

3:55 PM  
Blogger jackabug said...

I loved Martha's show too!
My son evacuated from New Orleans and now they can't get out of Houston. I'm praying for everybody.
Jackie

6:07 PM  
Blogger methatiam said...

A friend of mine is in the path as well. Here's what he said:

Now everyone in the West knows that Pecos Bill could ride anything. No bronco could throw him, no sir! Fact is, I only heard of Bill getting' throwed once in his whole career as a cowboy. Yep, it was that time he was up Kansas way and decided to ride him a tornado.

Now Bill wasn't gonna ride jest any tornado, no ma'am. He waited for the biggest gol-durned tornado you ever saw. It was turning the sky black and green, and roaring so loud it woke up the farmers away over in China. Well, Bill jest grabbed that there tornado, pushed it to the ground and jumped on its back. The tornado whipped and whirled and sidewinded and generally cussed its bad luck all the way down to Texas. Tied the rivers into knots, flattened all the forests so bad they had to rename one place the Staked Plains. But Bill jest rode along all calm-like, give it an occasional jab with his spurs.

Finally, that tornado decided it wasn't getting this cowboy off its back no-how. So it headed west to California and jest rained itself out. Made so much water it washed out the Grand Canyon. That tornado was down to practically nothing when Bill finally fell off. He hit the ground so hard it sank below sea level. Folks call the spot Death Valley.

Anyway, that's how rodeo got started. Though most cowboys stick to broncos these days.


Texans - SHEESH!

6:12 PM  
Blogger Gina said...

Wishing your husband's family the best.

I really wanted to like the show, but none of the contestants was even remotely compelling to me.

8:58 PM  
Anonymous John said...

Hi. I just read your post from yesterday. I'm sorry about your father. I too am a ham radio operator, have been for over twenty years. Great posts here! And Ann Marie sent me from Just Rambling, via an email. Hope your day is good Mel.

4:56 AM  
Blogger Elizabeth said...

Well, you know, she can't say 'you're fired' because that's The Donald's thing to say and you don't mess with The Donald or he'll stand right up in your face and yell, "LOOK AT MY HAIR! LOOK AT MY HAIR!!" and then you cower away and say "NOOOOOOO!" and he says, "I'M THE ONLY ONE WHO SAYS 'YOU'RE FIRED!' and you agree because you just might drop dead if you have to get close to 'the hair' again, especially if a gust of wind blows it your way.

I can only imagine the number of meetings it took to finally come up with 'You don't fit in. Good-bye.'

Looks like your husband's family will be o-tay. Still, it won't be fun. I know you don't drink but that's why God invented beer and wine. I imagine your outlaws will have a helluva good time.

We turned around because the traffic was INSANE. People were camping out on the side of the road because they ran out of gas. We didn't want to end up like that, in 100 degree weather and two dogs in tow. Ugh.

When we got back and went on our beer and food-that's-bad-for-you run we saw a family camped out under a spacious oak tree with their two kids, two cows, four goats and some hay.

When will we ever learn that THERE IS NO PLAN. Our tax dollars do not go into planning. That's just way to cerebral. We don't want our elected officials to have to think too much.

6:25 AM  
Anonymous Simply Coll said...

My thoughts are with your husband's family. I hope all goes well.

Darn.. I had to work evenings this week and missed both Martha's and Donald's Apprentice shows. Maybe next week I will be able to catch one of them.

7:45 AM  
Blogger The Scarlet Pervygirl said...

I don't know, I think "You just don't fit in" is a scarier, more outrageous thing to hear as an adult than as a junior-high student.

Two years ago I got fired from a job for, in the manager's eyes, refusing to recite a poem about a chicken with a Protestant work-ethic. A poem everyone else had recited. No one else had a problem with reciting this poem, she told me, and she really wanted to make the company look good to headquarters. If I wouldn't do it, and do it when she told me to, I didn't have the "spirit of co-operation" she expected from her employees, and I wasn't welcome to work there.

A month previously, I had been given *two* awards for being an outstanding employee who was always ready and willing to help out anybody who needed it.

It's awful to hear as a junior-high student because, so what? It's not like you're hurting anybody. But it's just fucking *sick* to hear that as an adult, because your job, your livelihood, should not depend on whether you "fit in" or not.

11:03 AM  
Blogger Vashti said...

"You just don't fit in." That's harsh! I can really get wrapped up in The Apprentice too. I'll have to check out the new Martha show. It's a sick sort of addiction, eh?

I'm trying something new on my blog. "Free Song Friday." I'm trying to post a new recording each week. It will help me keep my sanity through homeschooling since I'm not "out there" singing anymore. Anyway...I'm asking a few people to test it for technical "user friendliness" for me. If you have a moment let me know if it works smoothly with your computer and connection. Thanks.

I hope your husband's family is okay.

12:46 PM  
Blogger WordsRock said...

I've never really fit in and didn't need anyone to tell me. :)

Wendy's family is sitting right in the path also. Here's hoping everyone makes it through safely.

Suzanne

12:59 PM  
Blogger Eyes said...

That's so true. I, too, would rather be fried -- oops-- I mean fired rather than told I do not fit in.

The reality for me is I don't fit in anywhere LOL. I am too out-there, on the fringes. I don't embrace most things that are mainstream.

Thanks for stopping by today. You made me happy :)

4:12 PM  
Blogger Judy said...

I don't fit in either.

Don't even try to, anymore.

That's one of the bonus' of getting old.

Even if at one time you did fit in, you don't anymore. But you forget things, like that you used to care.

I'm not on the edge, or even fringe. I'm just bone-numbingly boring.

5:06 PM  
Blogger Julana said...

Oh Mel,
Have a member of your family with a visibile disability, and you'll give up trying to fit in.

I listened to Vashti's song, and wished I were living in the country again.

6:30 PM  
Blogger Lizanne said...

My hubbie and I are big apprentice fans and I have to say that just as team Matchstick did not connect with their audience, "You don't fit in, goodbye." did not connect with us.

We watched this to relieve the stress of the past couple of days.

We are praying for your family. Things are looking better here than predicted.

7:09 PM  

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